Everyone at the hostel smokes, everyone in Europe smokes. I
feel a little left out. While I don’t envy the lung cancer, the constant
coughing, the shortages of breath, the addiction, and the lack of money
that smokers face, there is something I do envy about them. I envy the
fact that smokers are never at a loss for something to do.
Everyone smokes in the dining room of the hostel. Some smoke while
reading a book, some eat to kill time between their cigarettes, others
smoke simply because they have nothing better to do. Idle hands? Roll a
cigarette. Oral fixation? Smoke a cigarette? Coughing like a maniac? Put
some more smoke in your lungs, fight fire with fire.
Cigarette smokers always have something to do because it occupies their
time. If they are bored, they can go smoke a cigarette. The same applies
if they are anxious, tired, energetic, sad, happy, or any range of
emotion. It’s even something to do in the post-coital collapse. At any
time, if a smoker is sitting with nothing to do, they can smoke a
cigarette.
"But," you might ask, "What happens when the smoker runs
out of cigarettes?"
A very good question, it shows insight, I’m glad you asked.
If the smoker runs out of cigarettes, this gives them even more things
to do. The obvious thing to do is to go buy cigarettes. But if the smoker
has no money, then they can occupy their time looking for money, or
getting money, and then buying the cigarettes. They can also just forego
buying cigarettes and bum them off of people, friends or strangers. This
encourages them to be social and also gives them something to do.
You may find a bored smoker (apathy and boredom come with every pack of
cigarettes), but you will never find an unoccupied one. At some time or
another they will always be doing something. Can we non-smokers say the
same?
No, we can not. On the other hand, nine times out of ten, our lungs
work a lot better, and we generally have four extra pounds in our pockets
while a smoker does not.
So there.
